Bitterness

Bitterness is a strongman of the enemy.  Just as there are ranks of angels (like in the armed forces), there are also ranks of fallen angels and demons.  Bitterness is a high-ranking evil spirit, but it comes in so subtly and so gradually that we’re unaware that we have even strayed into the enemy’s territory.  Here’s how it all works:

Unforgiveness – It all starts with unforgiveness.  Someone hurts you.  They say or do something that hurts you.  You must understand that people were not made to hurt, betray, or be mean to each other.  It is not in our original design.  But under the influence of the demonic voices all around us, we can inadvertently say or do something that hurts another person.

You are probably not even aware of it, but there are voices speaking to us all the time.  There is the voice of God, and there is the voice of the enemy—and we don’t even realize that we are listening to the enemy and being influenced by him.  So when someone says or does something to hurt you, they are acting on what they are hearing from the enemy.

Then you respond, acting on what you are hearing from the enemy.  The enemy says, “How could she say that about me?” and you repeat it as if it was a thought born from your own mind: “How could she say that about me?”

Every time you think you might be over the hurt, the enemy reminds you of it so that you have a very hard time getting over that hurt.  Unforgiveness is a small spirit, but now that it has been welcomed into your heart, it becomes very hard to forgive.

Resentment – Then resentment joins unforgiveness.  Under resentment’s tutelage you vow never to speak to that person again, to never allow that person to hurt you again.

Retaliation – The spirit of retaliation goads you into getting some satisfaction for the hurt you’ve suffered.  Retaliation promises to feel so good, but in fact can get you into a whole lot of trouble.  Retaliation actively seeks to prevent blessing from coming into the offender’s life.  Now, ask yourself, who exists to prevent blessings from coming into people’s lives?

Anger, Wrath, & Murder – When unforgiveness is finally joined by its bigger, stronger brothers, it is very difficult to go back and forgive.  Of course, not all unforgiveness ends in physical murder, but it can often end in character assassination.  We’ve all heard of an unforgiving father say to his son: “You’re dead to me.”  In his mind, the father has murdered the son, and the relationship is as good as dead from then.

People think that negative emotions, such as anger, depression, and unforgiveness, are merely emotions.  In fact, they are not emotions at all.  They are demons that can be cast out or sent away.  I have suffered lengthy very profound bouts of depression.  I was unaware that depression was a spirit at the time, but during the worst depressions I suffered suicidal thoughts and even suicidal hallucinations that I knew were not originating from my own mind.  I wasn’t possessed, but rather, I was suffering terrible demonic oppression.

Bitterness wants to produce fruit in your life: hatred, cruelty, revenge, self-pity, hypocrisy, jealousy, competition, frustration, and confusion.  Yes, even a little thing like competition, which American culture says is healthy, is in fact a foothold for the enemy.  Think about how many times you’ve seen someone get frustrated that the game didn’t go their way, and they turn the board over, scatter the cards everywhere, or they let the game’s physical side become too violent.

Self-pity is not an emotion, it’s a spirit.  It brings thoughts of entitlement—entitlement that has been violated.  Once we become aware of the enemy’s tactics, we can guard ourselves from jumping to the enemy’s camp.  I don’t want to give the enemy even the smallest victory over myself.

Bitterness can be present in your life without you even being aware of it.  And once this process is begun, it is very difficult to reverse it.  Sometimes you will have lived under the influence of bitterness for such a long time that you might not even believe that you are bitter.

Let me show you how bitterness can enter in: the offender, under the influence of the enemy says or does something that is truly wrong, evil, and bad.  The spirit of bitterness has been standing by, and takes that moment of offence to push its way into your heart.  Were you wronged?  Absolutely.  That is how the enemy works: by pushing his way in.  There’s no waiting for an invitation.  When you’re at your most vulnerable, he pushes his way in and begins speaking poisonous thoughts to you, playing on outrage, embarrassment, humiliation, hurt pride, physical suffering, violated boundaries, etc.  You believe these thoughts to be your own, when they are not.  And thus, piece by piece bitterness builds until it has become anger.  Anger can be so strong and so swift that it is literally just a heartbeat away from murder.

Forgiveness is a decision, not an emotion.  You can decide to forgive.  And that decision takes follow-through.  There were some people in my life that I have had to forgive all over again every time they came to my mind.  And I always did so, hoping for the day when that decision to forgive would finally become an emotional fact.  But true forgiveness did not come until I went back (in my mind and memory) to the time of the offense and forgave it there.  In that final act of forgiveness, I had to consciously give up all my rights to be angry or outraged at the offense.  The next time that person came to mind, the thought that came almost reflexively into my mind was: how could she possibly have known how precious I am to God?  My only feeling toward her, even remembering what she had done to me was pity that she hadn’t known how precious I am to God.

Forgiving was made easier once I understood the enemy hiding behind the person used to hurt me.  In truth, I have also been used by the enemy to hurt other people.  When you truly can grasp the realities hidden from our eyes, it becomes so much easier to give people the mercy and grace that we hope for from them, too.

Giving in to a spirit of bitterness or forgiving as generously as God has forgiven us is a life-changing decision.  Bitterness can prevent blessings in your life.  And through bitterness, the enemy might use you to prevent blessings in the lives of others.  Worse than all that, it can bring curses, especially in the form of physical illness.  Anger, hatred, and bitterness go coursing through your veins like a caustic, like poison.  If you’re aware, you might even feel it burning in your veins.

Giving up your right to be angry at an offense can feel like dying to yourself—in fact, that’s exactly what it is.  But you won’t truly begin to live until you do die to yourself.  It’s part of God’s upside-down logic that turns the world’s logic on its head.  Why is it so hard?  Because you are making a frontal attack on your own pride.

Make a decision to begin seeing people the way God sees them—ask God to help you to see people the way He sees them.  You will find that you have more love and mercy for them, and forgiveness will flow easier and easier.  More than that, blessings will flow in your own life as never before.

So let go of your anger and bitterness!  God is good!

Break Every Chain

After only 3 hours, both Molly and I wanted to get back to the Prayer Center.  It wasn’t a lot of sleep, but both of us got 3 very good hours of sleep.  I love that we got to be the ones to launch the 24/7 prayer.  It was out of my comfort zone, but so worth it!  In fact, every time that I have stepped out of my comfort zone in response to God’s call, I have enjoyed it and been blessed.

And speaking of being called out of my comfort zone, God has encouraged me to speak to people here in Malta—strangers!  Those who know me might be surprised, but I’m really quite shy, especially when it comes to talking to strangers.  My mom is really good at striking up a conversation with a stranger, and seems to be able to do it anytime and anywhere, with grace and freedom.  I have not enjoyed such ability or success whenever I have tried.  But, since it is God that is calling me out of my comfort zone, I will do it, and will enjoy it and will be blessed.

In obedience, I have started to greet everyone I see on the street (except the ones that are talking on their phones).  Most people have responded in a friendly way.  In Texas I used to greet everyone on the street, even strangers.  But in Milan and in the northeastern US, I have gotten such odd and sometimes hostile reactions that I stopped doing it.  I spoke to the man next to me on the bus this morning, but found that his accent and the background noise made it really hard to understand him.  Although he didn’t seem to be quite awake, he responded in a friendly way.  When we got to the end of the line, he wished me a nice day.

Yesterday we had more prayer requests from the other Transform teams, and had a prayer meeting with local believers.  One couple came with their 10 year old son, but soon after worship started, they suddenly left.  I don’t know if they were offended by the freedom of our worship or if they had some unrelated issue.  It definitely was not our intent to offend anyone.  Malta is even more religiously Catholic than Italy—celebrating saint days with colored lights and garlands and fireworks and parades of statues in the streets.  The Renewal Movement (Charismatic Catholicism) has begun here, but it is not the majority by any means.  Most Catholics here, as in Italy, are nominal, ritualistically religious, or superstitiously religious.  True faith is rare here in Malta.  But it won’t stay that way.

Another issue for the Maltese is refugee boat people from Africa.  Most of the boat people drown before making land, but such is the desperation of these people that they just keep coming.  The same current that caused the Apostle Paul’s boat to shipwreck on Malta brings the African boats to these shores instead of to Italy (though many do land in Italy).  The European Union has told Malta that they must keep the boat people, so the population of the island has changed dramatically.  Many Maltese resent the presence of the Africans, feeling that their island has been invaded, their jobs taken, and their economy drained.  The fact is that the European Union financially helps Malta, though I don’t know how much.  Refugees are put into detention centers for a year while their backgrounds are checked.  As you can imagine, this is not a quick process, working in cooperation with various African governments that do not want to have these people returned to be a drain on their own struggling economies.  Then the refugees are released to find work that nobody else wants to do because of low pay or the danger involved.

Molly, who is a black African, discovered firsthand the anger and resentment of the Maltese for the African refugees.  She was walking with 2 other girls from our team, and they spoke to people in the park.  They asked one older man if they could pray for him.  An ugly look came over his face and he pointed his finger at Molly, shouting: “Pray about them!”

The unexpected venom of his anger startled and hurt Molly.  But later as she told us about the incident, Molly prayed for the man, forgiving him and releasing him to God’s love.  While walking with Molly, I saw another older man who scowled at Molly.  I turned to her and said, “Molly, I’m so sorry for the way that man spoke to you!”  How terrible to be hated so much just because of the color of your skin!  The man had no idea what a sweet person Molly is, or that she had come for the specific purpose of praying for his country.

Jesus is the chain-breaker, and He will break every chain and proclaim freedom to the captives.  Yes, Lord!  Break every chain!  God is good!

Get Over Yourself, Ya Big Whinin Baby!

Oh, poor little me!

The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.  Day after day, in the temple courts and from house to house, they never stopped teaching and proclaiming the good news that Jesus is the Messiah, (Acts 5:41-42, emphasis mine).

This passage always blows my mind, how the apostles rejoiced because they were persecuted.  This was in today’s reading in my “read through the New Testament in 1 year” reading on Bible Gateway.

The first time I wrote about this passage was 2 years ago during my Faith Trip (recounted day-by-day in my book Look, Listen, Love).  At the time I had been waiting for over a week in a nice apartment by the beach in Abruzzo—oh poor little me, right?  Well, it was a struggle for me because I was anxious to go join Jesus is the Answer in Romania.  I had stayed overnight with JITA in Tuscany a few weeks previously in one of their containers.  They travel throughout Europe (and other parts of the world) in tricked-out containers, sharing Jesus under a big circus tent through street entertainment or compassion work (depending on the area).  In Tuscany it was largely entertainment evangelism, but in Romania it would be compassion work.  I wanted to get out and share the Gospel, which I had thought was important for the Faith Trip.  But God wanted to do some interior work on me, which was the true objective of the Faith Trip.  Since the Faith Trip had been His idea, and since He’s, well, God!, obviously, He got his way.  But meanwhile I cried and whined like a big baby.  It’s embarrassing!

Home Sweet Container!

So God used this passage from Acts to give me some true perspective.  I thought I was suffering for my faith.  No, darling, here’s what true suffering looks like, and here’s how a saint endures suffering: rejoicing!

Blessed are you when people hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man.  Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven. For that is how their ancestors treated the prophets, (Luke 6:22-23, emphasis mine).

Since that time I’ve gained more understanding about persecution.  Last year I read Tortured for Christ by Richard Wurmbrand—right before visiting southern Hungary.  I heard Pastor H. Koraćs Gėza speak in a church while I was there.  Pastor Gėza had been a pastor under Communism, and having just read Tortured for Christ, I felt moved to apologize for the fact that my country had done nothing to help the situation of Christians under Communism.  Pastor Gėza responded that Christianity had actually flourished under Communism.  He said that the Church faces a far more dangerous enemy today: complacency.  I realized that he’s right.

I’ve heard of missionaries who told an underground Chinese house church that they’re praying for democracy.  The Chinese told them: “Please stop!  The church is growing under persecution.”

In fact, throughout church history, Christianity has always thrived under persecution.  It wasn’t until Christianity was legalized in the 3^rd century under Emperor Constantine that the gifts of the Holy Spirit began to decline.

Even before that, all throughout the book of Judges, you can see that when they enjoyed prosperity, Israel forgot about the Lord.  Then God allowed trouble to come, the people repented and sought the Lord, and the Lord blessed them.  And the cycle started all over again.

So today’s Bible reading was a reminder that when the going gets tough, Christianity thrives, even if Christians are experiencing temporary difficulties, trouble, or persecution.  If we take a moment to consider, everything that happens in this life is temporary.

This morning I got a message from a dear friend who is right in the middle of persecution by people around her and attacks from the enemy, as well.  Here’s what I wrote to her (hope it helps you, too!):

There are 2 times when the devil attacks believers:

1. When he sees that God has blessed you and used you mightily; and
2. When he sees that God is about to bless you and use you mightily.

The first comes after the blessing, and the other comes before the blessing.  So when the enemy attacks you, start to praise God for those blessings that have been or are coming.  Nothing makes him back away from you like praise.  And praise salted with tears is precious to the Lord.  He will bless you even more for praise that comes from your brokenness.  Why?  Because praising God in your brokenness takes faith!  Without faith it is impossible to please God.

And remember, it’s all temporary!  Oh, yes, and God is good!

Betrayal

The Bait of Satan by John Bevere

Day Six

This is day 6 of a 21 day fast for understanding the End Times (now), and knowing how to prepare for the perilous days ahead.  Today I heard a sermon by John Bevere based on his book The Bait of Satan.  The key scripture is Matthew 24:10-12, in which Jesus is speaking of the End Times (NKJV):

And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another.  Then many false prophets will rise up and deceive many.  And because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will grow cold (emphasis mine).

He pointed out that the word translated as love is agape, Christian love.  So Jesus isn’t speaking of unbelievers, He’s talking about God’s people.  People in the church—Christians—will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another.  Lawlessness will abound in the church—among Christians.

Lawlessness means being a law unto yourself, not submitted to God’s authority.  So, not necessarily sinning, but definitely not submitted and following Jesus.  In an atmosphere of lawlessness, of course many will be offended.

Proverbs 18:19 says: “A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city, and contentions are like the bars of a castle” (NKJV).  In those days strong cities were surrounded by walls, also called strongholds.  2 Corinthians 10:3-5 says:

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does.  The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.  We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ (emphasis mine).

Instead of the word pretension, the Phillips translation says “every deceptive fantasy and every imposing defence that men erect. . .”.

Bevere said that an offended person’s thoughts become strongholds—arguments, deceptive fantasies, imposing defences—and that is how offense leads to betrayal.  He defines betrayal as seeking to benefit or protect one’s self at the expense of someone you have a relationship with—the ultimate abandonment of a relationship.

Betrayal leads to hatred.  Hatred is not a strong emotion like love or anger, but is the absence of love, lovelessness.

Going back to Matthew 24, verse 11 says: “Then many false prophets will rise up and deceive many.”  An offended heart is the breeding ground for deception.  They will genuinely believe that they are right, when in fact, they are wrong.

Offense and deception lead people to isolate themselves: “A man who isolates himself seeks his own desire; he rages against all wise judgment,” (NKJV, emphasis mine).  Rather than seeking God’s wisdom or the guidance and counsel of their pastor or believing friends, the offended and deceived person isolates themselves and rages against all wise judgment.  They seek only their own counsel.  Isolation happens in the thoughts.  It is very likely that the offended person still goes to church, but remains isolated in their mind, which makes them a perfect candidate for deception.

“. . . because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will grow cold,” (Matthew 24, verse 12).  The person is not seeking God, and not submitted to God’s authority, and likely they were already lawless before the offense.  When offended, their love (agape) will grow cold (hatred).

The person who can offend you the deepest is the person closest to you—your spouse, best friend, or pastor.  And it is very likely that the offended person has been genuinely mistreated.  But Bevere points out that if you want to walk with God, you don’t have the right to be offended.

This past year I have seen offense and betrayal up close and personal 4 times, in both marriages and ministries.  Twice I was a participant.  Once I was the party offended.  I had been so angry as a result of the offense that I was literally out of my mind.  It is true that this person genuinely mistreated me, and it is also true that there was no actual sin involved.  My wake-up call came when I couldn’t stop myself from raging at this person to the point of tears and fleeing from my presence.  That’s when I realized that my anger was way out of proportion with the offense.  I sought God and asked forgiveness from Him and from the person, both of whom were gracious to me, and there was a full reconciliation.

In the other incident, I had thought that only the other person was offended by something I had done.  In fact, we were both offended and we both betrayed each other.  I had been so deceived as to believe that I hadn’t been offended and that I hadn’t betrayed this person.  But in prayerful examination, I now see the truth.  The devil had been working both sides of this situation.  In this case, I’m not sure how to be reconciled to this person, but now that I can see my part in it, there’s at least the hope of reconciliation.

Be warned!  The deception is very powerful.  Verse 13 of Matthew 24 continues: “But he who endures to the end shall be saved.”  You can be right as right can be, and still go to hell because of your attitude.  We’ve got to be alert and firm in our love for one another.

To see John Bevere’s full sermon follow this link: The Bait of Satan.  God is good!  He’s also very patient with me!

Rebel No More

Greetings from southern Italy!

Last night I was walking past a shop selling tourist stuff and they had a Confederate Rebel flag (Dixie) out there for sale.  So I went in and talked to the owners of the shop.  I told them about the hateful symbol that it is for Americans, especially for black Americans.  I told them that I know it is not part of their culture, and that is why I had stopped to explain to them what it means to Americans.  They said that they just liked the way the flag looked.

I find the Dixie flag offensive because it is a symbol of the enslavement of an entire race of people—people who were kidnapped from their homelands.  Slavery is wrong, and I believe that it is demonic.  Take human trafficking, for example.  How is the historic enslavement of the African people any different from human trafficking today?  I believe that the answer is that it is not.  Yes, human trafficking involves prostitution, but African women were also frequently used for sex by their white masters.  Besides, prostitution is by no means the only form that human trafficking takes.  There are people working in slavery all around the world that you never see because the majority of them are kept hidden.

The facts of the American Civil War are history—ancient history to this generation of Americans.  Many people wonder why that flag is so controversial, and say that we should simply get over it because it is an historical fact.  I think that the people who don’t have a problem with the Dixie flag need to ask themselves if they also have no problem with the Nazi flag.  If they also see nothing wrong with the Nazi flag, then they are clearly racists who are more interested in spreading hatred than understanding.

Obviously, we all need to get past old offenses and get on with the business of life in the 22^nd century.  But some wounds run very deep.  They need the patient understanding and need a sensitive and considered approach.  The government has debated making reparations and apologizing for slavery.  I don’t know how you can possibly repay for such a terrible offense, but something would be better than nothing.  Did they ever do anything in the end?  I don’t know.

But here’s what I do know:  today I walked past that same shop, and in place of the Rebel flag was an American flag.  I turned to my friends and said, “Now these are good people here!”  I knew all along that they probably just didn’t know what the flag symbolized.  God is good, and He puts good people in my path.